I intend to win a free spot at the Summit this year. I am going to stay at a resort with a bunch of other cam models and learn a bunch of cool shit! I am going to the beach !!!!! In all honesty, the thought of being around all the other models makes me feel a little scared. I really want the chance to face that fear and to absorb as much as I possibly can.
- Skin care
- Drink enough water
- Make healthy food choices
- Yoga 5 times a week
- Get enough sleep!!!!
- Quit your nail job
- Tiger lily behind ear/neck
- Orchids with ??? to cover up peach and border beach scene
- Cover up for zebra, alter back somehow
- Study poses and the movements of my body
- Gallery of 1,000 great photos
I had the craziest private session on camera yet. I invited one of my guy friends over and he sat in the corner and watched me work. The crowd loved it. It was my third best night yet.
I met someone really cool in my room today. Our conversation sparked tons of ideas for being on cam.
I watched my neighbor help his friend move in. He looked super sexy carrying all that furniture.
I turned 31 and I feel really good about the year to come. I was surprised how many people wished me a happy birthday. I’m obsessed with the scent of this candle my sister got me from Hawaii.
I had a great dinner with my parents and they sat us in the Willie Nelson corner, which was totally fitting.
I heard Peaches by The Presidents of the United States of America on the radio.
I’m feeling much more comfortable on camera lately. I am ready to start studying and improving myself. I think I may finally have my scheduling about figured out as well.
I discovered Shakey Graves.
I had this dream about fucking a guy I work with, pretty great dream.
I looked out the window while I was getting ready for work and this guy was singing in his car, like really into it. He may have been rapping, I couldn’t tell. I also just remembered that I saw a guy on a motorcycle earlier this week jamming out super loud to Wobble.
When I went in to work my co-worker had gotten me a gift certificate to my favorite coffee shop.
I rearranged my room and added some color. It feels soooo much better in here.
I felt amazing at yoga Wednesday despite it being my first class this week. I felt stronger than I usually do.
Happy with myself for not going home early from work and skipping yoga.
I was out of bud and couldn’t find any and then one of my clients unexpectedly tipped me in bud!
I had to stand up for myself a lot the past couple weeks and I feel good about it for once instead of guilty. The end of my week was rough, but it all led to a big epiphany. I needed all of it.
The universe is limitless, abundant and strangely accommodating. When I direct my attention toward the good things in my life, even better things start to happen. These were the good things in my life over the last two weeks:
Someone put a giant sign out by the road that says Sausage Sangwich $3.00 hahaha
I got a $25 gift card for Kohl’s in the mail this morning.
I didn’t let the girl at the coffee shop complain to me about her allergies or all the shit other people don’t do when she’s gone. It was nice. I’m starting to feel like I’m over that place, which will really just benefit me as well.
Tuesday yoga was really nice. Hip openers this week and class was challenging, but not as difficult as it has been lately. And it was actually warm up there instead of freezing which was a really nice first.
My friends like to come over and kick it at my new house. I had a house full of people today and it was such a nice change from being cooped up in that tiny apartment where you feel like you can’t even move or relax.
My co-worker referred to the band The Cranberries as The Raspberries. I chuckled for a good while inside.
One of my older clients and I were talking about fruit arrangements and she told me that she really only likes the balls.
I got asked out at a stoplight on the way to my friend’s house by the guy in the car next to me. I wasn’t interested, but it still made me feel good.
I’m feeling very strong and flexible at yoga lately. I notice a really huge difference in where I am now compared to last year. Things that use to be really hard feel good to me now, like binds. Boat pose use to feel impossible and today it was easy.
Made eggs over easy for the first time in the new house and realized that its level, unlike my apartment.
Redeemed the Kohl’s gift card for a bottle of Guess Girl and with my coupons I only spend $3.
I haven’t really had much time to write lately. This makes me happy because my life is actually getting exciting.
The universe is limitless, abundant and strangely accommodating. When I direct my attention toward the good things in my life, even better things start to happen. These were the good things in my life this week:
I fell asleep early last night and I think I’m finally caught up on sleep. Feeling pretty great. ☀️
Was sitting here thinking how I wished it would rain so I wouldn’t have to mow the grass and then a guy knocked on the door and offered to do it for $10. Hell yes.
I ordered a pizza from a new place around the corner and it came with free ranch dressing. Like the good restaurant kind.
I stood up into a bird of paradise pose at yoga for the first time. So so grateful for my Tuesday yoga teacher and how hard she pushes me.
My cat loves his new hotel. He wants to play in in all the time, sleeps in it all day. We were playing in it today and he just passed out right in the middle. He is currently chasing a gushers wrapper back and forth behind the curtains. So many things he loves about the new house and it really makes me happy.
My futon arrived and I had time to set it up before work. I was glad it came while I was at home so it wasn’t sitting on my porch all day in the rain.
The sun was beaming down through the clouds this evening and you could see all these giant rays glowing. It’s hard to explain what it looked like, but it was beautiful.
I have been using milk made by a local couple for my lattes and I only find it in a pint size at random stores around me. Well, this morning I noticed a gas station near me sells the milk and they order gallons and half gallons for customers! Finally!!
I finally have my house and all the errands that come along with moving finished!!
It was kind of hard to do this post because i had such a rough week of people taking their shit out on me and trying to make me miserable, but I am so so so grateful this week is finally over and so I can just be home with my cat and finally relax. A lot of people got blocked from my phone this week. Just don’t need it. I welcome new and more positive people into my life now.
I want to become a cam star. I love the idea of being famous online and being a normal person where I live, though I wouldn’t be opposed to something bigger. I want to have a regular clientele and I want to be on the leaderboards regularly. I would make so much money I would never worry about having enough to pay bills ever again. I will be taking care of myself like it’s my job–well it is. I will exercise, eat right, get enough sleep and always make sure I have a little time for just me. I will have time to read, study and travel. I will be able to afford regular salon appointments and I won’t mind doing my nails because I will be on hiatus from that career. And I will feel great about myself too. I will love how I look and I will have so much more energy. I will have a really fun life. Tanned from the sun and happier from actually getting to absorb some Vitamin D. I’m going to be happier than I ever thought possible while always staying true to myself. I will have a beautiful natural look that is always on point. I will always stay true to my style as well and I will have my ideal wardrobe. I will always smell of Gardenia Woods and a perfume that compliments it. I will have grown to be much more humble than I am now. I will be much wiser and have learned an invaluable amount from my new career. I won’t live here anymore and I won’t care who knows what I do for a living. I would encourage people to be open with their sexuality and accepting of other people’s. And I will always stay in the flow. In fact, I will lounge in it like a lazy river. It’s where I need to be if I am to help other’s the best I can. So may the greatness and beautiful little gifts continue to multiply.